Where one door closes....a window will open to jump out of!

This week is Brandon's last week of elementary school. sniffle I'm a little sad over this. Okay lets just cut the bull, I'm a lot sad over this. It's like the end of an era. If I'm so sappy over this, can you just imagine when he leaves for college? You know you've seen those commercials where the minute the kid leaves home, the parents are turning their old room into some big thing, like an exercise room or a den or something. Well yeah, not me. Oh now I won't go creepy crazy over it and turn it into a shrine, but geez, let the kid have something to come home to on holidays! lol I seem to be getting ahead of myself here though. This year has been a toughie in parenting, between Brandon entering a strange unchartered age, Mom and Dad searching for a support group, and coming to grips with the "end" of something. The end of him being a kid I guess. He's already past that in looks, he's in a men's shoe size now, and just days ago I noticed he is most definitely taller than me now. As he stood next to me brushing his teeth the other night, the reality hit me. My kid COULD take me if he wanted to now. HA! I had a straight bird's eye view up his nose. This is why it is SO important to teach respect while they're little. If not then, by the time they get bigger than you, it might just be too late! And then I noticed his dark peach fuzz sprouting above his upper lip. I've had these recurring strange dreams lately, where I wake up, shuffle down the stairs, just like any morning, but as I round the corner into the kitchen, there sits Tom Selleck at my breakfast bar, telling me he's hungry, in Brandon's adolescent crackling voice. This is what I expect Brandon to look like when he gets older. lol Hopefully without the mustache. So with my son's rapid changes it's hard for me to keep him frozen in time as my "baby" anymore. He's moving on, with or without me for sure, so I better hang on for the ride! It's sure to be a bumpy one! We have several appearances to make for different end of the year celebrations at Brandon's school this week. Today was one such occasion, it was a class picnic/cookout. I have to say his teacher is a hoot, she has a great sense of humor (uh you'd have to to teach a classroom full of 12 year olds! shudder). So James, Hailey and I all went to celebrate and eat lunch with Brandon and his class. When we first arrived, we went in and waited just outside his classroom. The teacher was trying to get twenty eight 12 year olds to collectively shut up so we could get to the fun. Of course that's a futile effort, but at least she tries. After she finally regains control we all procede outside with a variety of food and the guys all go to do what they do best, fire up the grill. All the kids went different directions and Brandon, after a brief hey to his fam, ran off to play and not be seen associating with us again until we ate lunch. I talked with some of the mothers, we compared notes on our 12 year olds. It was sort of like a little support group meeting right there on the playground. HA! It's like every other mother there had the same question weighing on their mind. What on earth is up with my kid? So we laughed as we huddled together discussing the quirks of all of our kids, and we all breathed a cleansing sigh of relief because apparently, we all have very normal tweens that we will all have to find a way to love through all the arguing, mood swings and belching. Whew, what a relief! It's NOT just mine! Anyway, the food was prepared and what a spread we had! The parents sat back and waited for the kids to load up their plates. And what came next was much like watching wild animals paw and fight for food. There was a long line of 12 year olds that seemed scared the food would run out. Some of them clearly didn't like each other, or at least not for that moment, and picked at each other while moving through the line. The girls were more collected, but the boys were all goofy, gangly and gassy. Oh the loud sounds coming from many made most mothers look on in horror. I am sure we all were under the misconception that our sons were just heathen at home, not at school. But nope, not so. I am happy to report that Brandon held his gas until after he got home. So for that he got a pat on the back. But still, I'm sure he's let them rip with the rest of em before. So we all sat down and ate and had a great time, mothers talking meaningfully, a handful of Dad's talking in a real testosteroney way, and kids laughing and intermittantly running away from the food they fought so hard for to go play a quick round of basketball or tag. All in all it was a great time and a great way to observe their species at play, you know, the Tweenage species!

How to Mother a Tween for Dummies

Well I'm on a Reese Cup and Ruffles binder right now. Out went the good ole water and fruit diet, in exchange for my beloved Reese Cups and Ruffles potato chips. Why you ask? Why? Because there is a tweenager in this house that is driving me batty. Where oh where has my child gone? Abducted by aliens? Nope, although sometimes I wonder. No he's right here, but all of a sudden he's changed. My once happy go lucky go with the flow child, has now turned into a sometimes irritable, lazy and must have something to say about EVERYTHING young man. I know he's growing up. I know he's trying to assert a little independance. I've read, I've googled, I've explored...... Oh if only they came with instruction manuals!!! Ahhhhhh! This entire week has been an uphill battle. It's one thing after another, and I am not ashamed to say, I am worn out. waving little white flag I know I know, I need to man up here, this is but the beginning of it all! I have a whole new respect for what my mother must have gone through with me. If only she were still here to talk to! First she would laugh hysterically before offering any sort of comfort or ancient chinese secrets. I remember the curse she placed upon me, I believe I was 13 though at the time. Well that Mother's curse works! I am reaping the rewards as we speak!!! For every unkind argumentative hard way to go that I dished out to my parents.....now I have a mouthy, sometimes downright obnoxious tween in my grill, wanting to protest, correct or debate every thing I say. Ahhhhhhh! I hope to survive and be able to go on and pass down what lessons I learn through this trying time, but if I don't make it out alive....at least I gave it one heckuva try.

Take my hand and come out of the closet

Well Brandon is due home tomorrow morning from a fun and active week at 6th grade camp. His grandma asked me several times this week if I missed him, which I found humorous, almost like she doubts my sincerity when I say "uh, sure I do". But of course I missed him, he is most definitely the life of the party here at the Storey household! He has a big personality, and even bigger dreams. And even though sometimes his argumentative nature can wear a Mom down, yes I DID miss him. But for some reason, I am reminded of a different time and be patient while I explain. Let me take a trip down memory lane......you see when he was born, I was a young and clueless mother, who believed that babies ate, pooped and slept. At no point in time did ANYONE including my own mother warn me, that perhaps there would be ear piercing blood curdling crying. So I brought my new little bundle home and my heart never knew such love as this! I was bursting with joy and emotion. And then, 2 weeks later, he began to cry. And by cry, I mean you could hear him out on the street, shrieking cries. You see, out of the blue, he developed colic. Let's look up colic and see what exactly that means, especially to those of you with quiet (well is there really such a thing?) babies: Definition of Colic: Colic consists of recurrent paroxysms of apparent abdominal pain starting at about the second to the sixth week of life and usually ending by four months. These cycles last from three hours a day to 12 to 15 hours a day in severe cases. The child becomes hypertonic, sometimes alternating body posture from contracting into a little ball (thighs flexed up against the abdomen and arms drawn tightly inward), while beet red in coloration, to suddenly stretching out and stiffening almost spastically. Description of Colic: Infants cry, it is their means of vocal expression. There is, however, a group of infants who are healthy but show irritability, crying, and signs of discomfort to a greater extent than others. These infants have colic. This is a common problem arising in the first three months. Babies with colic are prone to lengthy bouts of crying which may or may not stop when the baby is picked up. The definition and description really doesn't do it justice. You really have to be there, experience it to really grasp what a nightmare it can be. Now just humor me here. I am sure you have no idea where I'm going with this. His grandma would take him on occasion for his 1-2 hours of happy time out of the 20+ hours of side splitting window shattering crying he would do. After she left with him, I would do whatever needed done around the house (I know this sounds crazy, but for the people who know about my ex husband, nuff said) and then I would lay down for a much needed coma hibernation nap. As soon as I passed out, the phone would ring, and it would always be my mother in law asking the same haunting question. "Do you miss your little punkin?" Which brings me back to the beginning. Remember now, this has been the question of the week. Now how do I respond to that? Truthfully? Um no. Because the truth would sound cold and make me look like the worst mom on earth. I was already on the verge of tears from the constant incessant crying, coupled with the lack of sleep, but add in a label of cold hearted mother and that might've just sent me over the edge. But honestly, no I did not miss him. I was so exhausted, often going 2 days straight with no sleep at all, that when I did get a little break from the constant crying and projectile pukefests (he had some digestive issues), that uh no, I rather enjoyed my brief siestas. Now this is not to say I didn't love him! But oh if you only knew....the odds were stacked against me from the get go. Now I don't go into this to gain sympathy because well c'mon, lets face it, he's way past the colicky stage now. I survived it and I am proud of it! I did it alone and I came out alive! But whether the kids are colicky or not, whether they're 2 weeks, 2 years or 12, don't we all love a break from time to time?! I know mothers who almost go into depression over being away from the children overnight. Now I just can't grasp that. Not only does it make ME look bad for actually enjoying the occasional break, but what did these people do BEFORE kids? Don't they enjoy having adult time, time with your spouse, time out with the girls...or even time alone with a good book and some Ben and Jerry's? Maybe it's just me, but I don't think I am in the minority on this. I think there's a whole lot of Moms in the closet on this one. Perhaps you are afraid of seeming unloving and uncaring if you admit it, but I am here to say lets stand united and sing Hallelujah for occasional "breaks" we can get! I challenge you to enjoy a stolen night away from the kids, just you and your husband, go have fun (remember? that thing you used to have together before the kids came along and started pecky away your sanity? ha!). Now this is all meant in fun, but isn't there but an air of truth to it? I love my children and I don't know what I'd do without them...but call me selfish, call me stressed, call me crazy, heck call me Conchita if you want, but I CAN however manage to occupy myself for an hour or a day while they're away, and even like it!